Pet Memorial Cross Stitch: Charting a Pet Who's Gone

When a pet dies, the photos stop. Whatever is on your phone, in a drawer or in a relative's messages is now all there is, and turning one of those pictures into something stitched can feel like a way to keep them in the room.

This guide is about doing that well when you can't go back and take a better photograph. It covers finding the best version of the pictures you already have, choosing between imperfect ones, sizing the chart, adding a name, and being realistic about time. There is no rush in any of it.

Before you start

Some people want to begin the week they lose a pet. Others can't look at the photos for months. Both are normal, and the project will be the same when you're ready.

If you're making this for someone else, a friend or a parent who has lost a dog or cat, it's kind to ask them for the photo rather than choosing one yourself. The picture they send is often not the one you'd expect, and it tells you which memory the piece should hold.

Gathering the photos

The best photo for a chart is rarely the one you see first. Look everywhere before choosing.

• Your camera roll and its cloud backup. The original file from the phone that took the picture is the most detailed version that exists.
• Other people's phones. Partners, children, neighbors and pet sitters often have pictures you've never seen, taken from angles you never had.
• Messages and social media. Useful for finding which photos exist, but copies sent through chat apps or saved back from social media are usually smaller and more compressed. When you find one you like, ask the person who took it for the original.
• Videos. A still frame from a video is sometimes the only image with the eyes open and the head turned the right way. It's usually softer than a photo, so treat it as a last resort.
• Printed photos. Older pets often live only in prints. Those can be scanned well, as below.

Put the candidates into one folder so you can compare them side by side.

Scanning a printed photo

A flatbed scanner gets far more out of a print than a phone camera pointed at it. The Library of Congress guidance on scanning your personal collections is short and practical:

• Clean the scanner glass first. Dust and smudges on the glass end up in the scan, and in a chart a speck can become a stray stitch.
• Scan 4 × 6 and 5 × 7 inch prints at 300 dpi.
• If you plan to enlarge the photo to 8 × 10 inches or more, scan at 400 or 600 dpi. A detailed cross stitch portrait is often bigger than the print it came from, so the higher setting is the safer choice.
• Save color scans as high-quality JPEG if you might reprint them, which the same guidance recommends for enlargements.
• Keep copies in more than one place. The Library suggests at least two copies, stored apart. These pictures are irreplaceable.

If you have no scanner, photograph the print flat, in daylight, straight on and without glare from a window or lamp.

Choosing between imperfect photos

With a living pet you can take the ideal photo. With a memorial, you choose the best of what exists, and that is usually a trade-off.

The inconvenient truth is that the photo you love most is not always the one that will stitch best. If the eyes aren't there in the photograph, they won't be there in the chart. It's worth making previews from two or three candidates before you decide, because a photo that seems second-best on a phone screen can make the better portrait.

Everything about eyes, fur and backgrounds in cross stitching a pet portrait from a photo applies here too. A dark coat has problems of its own: stitching a black dog or cat without a silhouette explains what a photo of a black pet needs to show.

When the only photo isn't very good

Sometimes there is one photo, and it's dark, small or blurry. That can still become a lovely piece. It just needs a different approach.

A chart can't add detail the photo doesn't hold. As arithmetic: if your pet's head is 60 pixels wide in the photo and you chart it 120 stitches wide, each pixel of the photo is spread across two stitches. The chart gets bigger, but it has no more information, so it looks soft and smudgy up close.

What works better with a poor photo:

• Go smaller. A modest chart keeps the blur below what the eye notices.
• Use fewer colors. A blurry photo produces many near-identical shades that turn into speckle. A tighter palette gives cleaner shapes; how many colors a photo pattern should use shows how to compare two color counts.
• Choose a bold treatment. A silhouette in their coat color, or a simple head shape with just the markings, can be more recognizable than a detailed chart of a blurry face.
• Let the name do more of the work. With a simple image, lettering and dates carry the meaning.

Making a cross stitch pattern from a low-resolution photo goes further into what a small image can and can't carry.

Sizing the memorial chart

Finished size comes from the chart's stitch count and the fabric count. DMC defines count as the number of stitches you can make in an inch, so finished size in inches is stitches divided by count. For framing, DMC recommends a border of at least 8 cm / 3 inches all the way round, which adds 6 inches to each dimension of fabric. To run the numbers for another count, work out your fabric size before you cut.

The same 150 × 150 chart on 18-count fabric is about 8.3 inches square. It holds exactly the same detail in a smaller piece, because detail comes from the stitch count, not the fabric.

Leave room for the name. Lettering sits below the portrait and adds rows. As an example: letters 7 stitches tall with a 3-row gap above them add 10 rows, which is about 0.7 inches on 14-count. Add that before you cut the fabric.

If a full framed piece feels like too much, a small round portrait can be finished as an ornament and hung somewhere you'll see it each year; a photo Christmas ornament cross stitch covers that size.

Name, dates and words

For many families the lettering is the heart of the piece. A few things make it work:

• Keep it smaller than the portrait. The animal should dominate; the words sit quietly underneath.
• Check the spelling and the dates twice, and ask someone else to check them. It's the one mistake that is painful to unpick.
• Consider the name they answered to. A nickname often means more than the name on the vet's records.
• Keep the words short. A name and years, or a name and three or four words, reads well at stitch scale. A long quote needs a much wider chart.
• Choose one lettering color that already appears in the portrait, such as the darkest coat shade. It ties the piece together and saves a skein.

Some stitchers add a small paw print or a heart beside the dates. Both are simple shapes that stitch cleanly in a single color.

Checking the preview before you commit

This is the moment to be picky, because it's much easier to change a chart than to unpick a month of stitching. Zoom right in and look for the things that made them them:

1. The eyes. Count how many stitches wide one eye is. If it's only two or three, crop tighter or increase the stitch count.
2. The catchlight. That small pale reflection in the eye is what makes a portrait look alive. Make sure it survived.
3. The markings. The white blaze, the odd ear, the grey muzzle of an old dog. If the preview has smoothed one away, try more colors or a larger chart.
4. The coat color. Hold the preview next to the photo. Screen color is approximate, but a golden dog shouldn't come out grey.
5. The whole thing, from a distance. Step back from the screen. If it looks like them from across a room, it will on a wall.

Make two or three versions with different sizes and color counts, and compare them side by side. Choose with your eyes rather than the settings.

How long it will take

Stitching speed varies enormously between people, so don't rely on anyone else's estimate. Measure your own:

1. Stitch one 10 × 10 block (100 stitches) of a mid-detail area and time it.
2. Divide the chart's total stitches by 100 to get the number of blocks.
3. Multiply.

As a worked example, not a measurement: at 15 minutes per block, the 150 × 150 chart above is 225 blocks, which is 3,375 minutes, or about 56 hours. At five hours a week that's roughly eleven weeks. Areas with many color changes, like fur, usually go slower than your test block.

That arithmetic matters most when a date is involved. It's tempting to aim for the anniversary of their death or their birthday. If the timing is tight, choose a smaller chart that you'll finish calmly rather than a large one you race to complete. How long a pet portrait cross stitch takes goes further into planning around your pace.

Stitching it

A memorial piece is sometimes hard to work on, and it's fine to put it down for a while.

• Start from the center of the chart and the fabric, as DMC recommends, so the portrait lands where you planned and the lettering has its space.
• Keep a printed copy of the photo nearby. When two dark shades look alike on the chart, the photo tells you what the stitches are meant to be.
• Buy a spare skein of the main coat color so you're not hunting for more halfway through. Every color in the key needs at least one skein; DMC floss comes in 8.7 yard / 8 meter skeins, and how much embroidery floss you need shows the arithmetic for the big areas.
• Keep working lengths short. DMC suggests a maximum of 50 cm, about 18 inches.

DMC describes its floss as colorfast and made with highly fade-resistant dyes, so a finished piece can be washed gently before framing without the colors bleeding.

If it's a gift for someone grieving

A stitched portrait of a pet who has died can be one of the most meaningful things you give someone, and also one of the most delicate. A few gentle suggestions:

• Ask for the photo, or ask a family member to help choose it. Surprises are lovely, but the wrong photo can land badly.
• Show them the preview if you're unsure it looks like the animal they remember.
• Don't tie it to a date you can't keep. A piece that arrives later, finished with care, is still received the same way.

Memorial pieces for people raise different questions, especially when the only photos are old; a memorial cross stitch from a photo of a loved one covers those. For other stitched gifts and how early to start each one, see cross stitch gifts from photos.

When you're ready, upload the photo you've chosen and look at their eyes in the preview first.

Frequently asked questions

What photo should I use for a pet memorial cross stitch?

The one where the eyes are sharpest, even if it isn't your favorite. Find the original file rather than a copy sent through a chat app or saved from social media, and ask family for theirs. A photo with clear eyes and a slightly awkward pose usually stitches better than a lovely blurry one.

Can I make a cross stitch pattern from an old printed photo?

Yes. Scan it rather than photographing it if you can. The Library of Congress suggests 300 dpi for 4 by 6 and 5 by 7 inch prints, and 400 or 600 dpi if you plan to enlarge them to 8 by 10 inches or more. Clean the scanner glass first so dust doesn't become stitches.

How big should a pet memorial cross stitch be?

Big enough that each eye is several stitches across, and small enough that you'll finish it. A head-and-shoulders chart around 150 stitches wide is about 10.7 inches on 14-count Aida. If your only photo is small or soft, a smaller, simpler chart will look better than a large one.

Should I add my pet's name and dates?

Many stitchers do, and it is often the part people read first. Keep the lettering small and below the portrait, check the spelling and dates twice before you stitch, and add the extra rows to your fabric size. A nickname can mean more than a formal name.

How long does a pet memorial cross stitch take?

It depends on your pace, so measure it. Time one 10 by 10 block, then multiply by the number of blocks in the chart. As an example, at 15 minutes a block, a 150 by 150 chart is about 56 hours. Avoid promising a date, especially for an anniversary.

What if my only photo of my pet is blurry?

Choose a simpler treatment rather than forcing detail. Fewer colors, a smaller chart or a bold silhouette can carry a blurry photo well, because the shape and coat color are still true. A large detailed chart only enlarges the blur, and the result can look like a different animal.

Sources

• Library of Congress — Scanning Your Personal Collections (300 dpi for 4×6 and 5×7 prints; 400 or 600 dpi to enlarge)
• DMC — What fabric should I use? (count is the number of stitches per inch)
• DMC — How to prepare your fabric (border of at least 8 cm / 3 inches)
• DMC — How to begin cross stitch (start from the center)
• DMC — How to use stranded thread (working length)
• DMC — Cotton Embroidery Floss (Mouliné Spécial): skein length, colorfast and fade-resistant dyes